full service hate 1/9/04
lost in the snow
burnt tulip
shattered yellow
make a show
of this evil
battered yellow
full service hate
beat it down
beat me down
lost yellow
fire in the snow
I own that desire 1/11/04
what I've always known
is being taught to me again
because I own that desire
to learn
what I've always had
is being given to me again
because I own that desire
to accept
abuse 2/3/04
the red life
pours from her mouth
as swift blows
banish her soul
to a black and blue river
never 2/3/04
terrifying joy
never have I
and
never will I
love anybody
like you
right now
how can I?
a first love
is unrepeateable
fresh
non-material and fragrant
never again
never like this
a night of loneliness 2/13/04
selfish you
how can I care for you
when you care not for me?
for them
barely for yourself
you drown
in blind dead end feelings
for him
for him who you will never have again
my helping hand
is batted away
clawed at by your razor words
now
I refuse to offer you this
any longer
your immaturity
crippling you
causing deafness
force 2/13/04
force these tears out of my desolate eyes
just as you would force
a blunt needle through thick skin
the force of your heartache on me
mends my heart to yours
we are both brought down
I feel the burn
as the force of your waterfall tears
crushes me
as I grope into your red eyes
for words that you can't force out
bitch look at the force
of your words on him
he is forced to examine his essence
something he need not question
wanted 2/20/04
missing man
tall
with intense blue eyes
surrounded by
magnetic attractive field
the reward I claimed
for seeking him and succeeding
a thousand kisses
and promises of bliss
only for me 2/20/04
you walk by
with a swift, careless smile
a grin meant only for me
the meaning known only by me
it screams love to me
and my eyes follow you
your steps are in my heart
temporary eternity 2/22/04
temporary eternity
in your broken arms
hold me
softly
until the sun greets the treetops
and I am released
from you effortless grip
an endless passion that ceased
my raw lips
your disheveled hair
teasing reminders
of what I check my watch for
check the sky for
waiting
no, not patiently
for a winking star
that appears with your hands
and again
I blissfully enter eternity
you ask me 2/22/04
you ask me
"how do you feel?"
I smile,
sigh
internal explosions
silence my well-traveled tongue
you ask me
"how do you feel?"
I sink,
shudder
words would ruin this
inbetween 2/22/04
you live here
but you're not there for me
I run from here
you stand there in my way
should I tell? 2/25/04
the words
to help you
and
the words
to hurt you
echo eachother
feelings to help
feelings to hurt
reside both in the same body
the same arms
give you a hug
and rip your heart out
needs 2/25/04
I need you
I need your warms arms around me
I need your scent infused with mine
I need you
but I will grow cold
and your scent will fade
as we grow old
new lives will be made
you need me
you need my listening ears
you need this woman's touch
you need me
but I will go away
and you forget my touch
yet now here we lay
loving eachother so much
